emo morning..

Is not a good thing to start a Saturday morning with such a emo weather,plus all the emo songs.Hah!happened to listen to David Archuleta's song when I woke up and my mind flew back to him again.The song "You Can" is the song I always listen to when he left for NS and whenever I am alone.This song used to remind me that I am not alone,remind me that I still have him to support me but the fact is always cruel to me.Now it became a reminder to remind me that nothing lasts forever,relationship is just another stupid game that will cost me a lot..my time,my energy,my tears,my brain cell,my money and the most important thing..MY STUDIES!

Anyway,I realised I am used to the life alone now.Everything by myself,no more busy worrying about something that is none of my business,wasting time helping people to deal with their problems when it is nothing to do with me.Starting to regret doing all these stuff,putting in so much effort for nothing.All I got back was,people took it for granted and that really pissed me off.I used to scared I will lose my friends,thinking maybe put in my heart and soul they will appreciate it but now the realities woke me up.I am not afraid being alone anymore.Frankly speaking,friends were one of the reason that ruined my relationship.I am not blaming my friends but myself.I used to put my friends in 1st priority till I didn't even noticed.He used to tell me hundred thousand times I still keep thinking I am right and did not neglect him thinking I need my freedom as well.After thinking,perhaps I really did neglect him.Well,learn from the mistakes.This is one of the suckest morning..

cheers~