A lil update about last week..

I have to say I had an super awesome week last week..and again I realise how wonderful n blissful I am to have a bunch a besties around..I am glad I have true friends everywhere..In JB..KL..Melbourne and Singapore..I am glad..hanging out with them always lighten up my day..and yea..2 birthday surprise in a week was real fun..eventhough I cant stay long for their celebration..but I already can feel..being with them..I have no burden at all..don have to think so much when I speak..because they always understand what I trying to say and how I really feel..those people are just to great..eventhough we dont always contact each other..but still..everytime we met up again..no barrier between us at all..and yea..thanks girls..you girls took my unhappiness away..eventhough it was just for temporary..thats more than enough..<3<3

cheers~

Year 2011 supposed to be a new year, a new life..but I am screwing it like hell..I seriously need to get myself out of the negative force..and start to be positive again..I can't wait for uni to start..I feel like studying again..can't wait to get a new place to stay..can't wait to stay alone..I am weird..well..but for now..I don't feel like going back..but I don't feel like staying any longer either..the feeling is terrible..never expect myself to start drinking again..but yea..hang out with my primary friends..and no matter where we meet..we will somehow end up in pub..and yea..yesterday night we did again..and for once..I was the driver..after 2 bottles of beer..I am feeling super emo and start thinking all the negative things again..but on the way back..when there weren't much car on the road..I was pretty enjoying it..I enjoyed the speed of 120km/h with the radio on to the max..without having the need to worry if I will get saman or knock people down driving alone middle of the night..it is very unhealthy but I kind of love it..and yea..I think is time for me to change..no more caring so much about people because they will take you for granted..no more daydreaming and be realistic..no more telling others about how sad or how upset you are when the one you are talking to don't give a damn on you and treating you coldly..stop assuming they are you close friends who you can rely on when everything is just a lie..all we need to do is train to be best actor/actress..fake all the way..no more assuming people who are nice to you are very sweet when all they wants are advantages from you..this world is no longer that pure anymore..perhaps if I still want to survive in this world..I have to start changing..learn not to be so soft hearted anymore..not to be weak..not to trust people so easily..and yea..this is what I feel recently..but I am not sure how much I can change..

cheers~

is only the 2nd day of year 2011..I am already feeling like crap..ROAR!!I don't know what happened to me!I am feeling so lazy..thinking of leaving soon..make me having the urge to cry..I am seriously having dilemma..don't feel like going back because I want to spend my CNY with my family..but wanting to go back so much because I want to get out of the hectic life here..I am soo tired and pissed sometimes..especially when people don't appreciate whatever I did..feel like letting everything go and don't feel like care so much anymore..sort of realise no matter how close you are with that person..he/she will still never understand how you feel or what you think..which is quite sad..always hoping to find a soul mate..who can really understand how I feel but it isn't that easy..sometimes..I don't even understand myself..

told myself to give up drinking..but tonight..because my godma was having a housewarming..I took the red wine again..and it is making me worst..but usually..after I drink..I will either be very high and forget everything temporary..or cry like mad..and will be fine after crying..but tonight..I am like no where in high or emo..but a super terrible feeling..when driving my mum home..I actually feel like speeding again..but too bad..my dad was following me behind..so I can't do anything..my mum has a super low alcohol tolerance..so she basically don't know how I drive when she was in the car..she was smiling and talking nonsense which was super cute..but well..anyway..I really don't like the feeling..and I seriously hate people for not replying my sms or msn..especially when the message ends with a question..and when you asked about it..he/she will say they are very busy..yet they have the bloody time to stalk people in facebook..how many second do you need just to reply a bloody sms..arrgh!

seriously feel like shouting..or close myself in a room and keep singing nonstop..this holiday is really pushing me like mad..is worst then during studying..haih..I am feeling so sleepy..still need to wake up early tomorrow..:(

aritey..off I go..good night!

cheers~

Happy New Year!!

Manage to stay up till 12am and wish all my friends a Happy New Year..eventhough isn't that awesome..but the feeling with family is really great..counting down together..on calling with sis who are currently in Melbourne now..wishing each other and shouting Happy New Year is really nice..got a bear hug from my dad n mum..and is soo sweet to be with them..my bro was just too cool to talk to me..a bit upset though but hey!is year 2011!!is gona be a new beginning..and more challenges awaiting for us to overcome!so people!!all the best!!and hope we will lead a awesome year!!=)

the 1st song I listened in year 2011..DANG!

kinda emo but is nice..I likey!