this date supposed to be our 13th months month-iversary..well..i know i shouldn't think about it..but it just came into my mind when i woke up early in the morning..we started to talk again..but apparently i was not treated like the past..i thought we will be able to be like last time..the time when he was my best friend..the friend who still will care about me and not the friend who will only answer any single questions i asked..apparently he didn't feel like talking to me..the thought of we might go back to the past was just another naive thought..and it kind of woke me up when he told me "do you still naively think that the love can last forever?"my heart got smashed again when i saw that sentence..yea..nothing last forever..there is no true love..there is no so called promises..when if you are married..you still can get divorced..that's the world..and now perhaps relationship is just a game for everyone..play it well..if u win then that's your future..if you lose..then too bad..pick up your broken heart and move on..or you can just continue waiting for the guy who will never come back..
and now..i am feeling extremely cold..feeling like an idiot..he is right..there is no fairytale in this world..true love only exist in TV show..cherish all the opportunities you have..if you miss it..too bad..because there might not have 2nd chance..once in a lifetime..that's it..i don't what else can i say to tell him how i truely feel and how to express myself..and i really don't know how to prove i am not lying..i believe to maintain a relationship really need to put in your heart and soul..but what if the 1 you are giving in can't feel anything over what you did to them..what else can i do?step back and move on?isn't that a bit unfair?i am so tired now..maybe i should get myself out of all the social network for the time being..and let nature takes it course..good night...
cheers..
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